Dear Santa BD,
Please disregard the flaming brown paper bag that may appear on your porch some evening soon! Also, the large elf with the RI Swamp Yankee accent that you will probably find up to his keister in a nearby snow drift, isn't to be believed. Please warm him up with some high octane Mexican chow and aim him back east. Oh,
DO NOT STAND DIRECTLY BEHIND HIM!
Thank you Dave and Happy Holiday wishes to you and all the 8 Balls!
"If you ignore the problem long enough, it will go away. Even flooding stops eventually!"